You Are Not What You Attract

This past month has been quite eventful. I’ve networked and met some interesting people. With me promoting my books and trying to establish a career in writing, it is important for me to network, mingle and meet new people. While I have met some people that are worth my time, allow me to address those that didn’t make the cut.

I absolutely hate when people say that you attract what you are. This statement couldn’t be any more true than water is red.  As I get older, I tend to be more open to the world we live in. Open mindedness is part of being well rounded. But what I won’t conform to is the idea that the type of people I attract is the same type of person I am. This goes for both friendships and intimate relationships.

When you’re getting to know someone, there are certain characteristics that you have in common. Then there are some areas that you will differ. In the beginning,  all I ask for is consistency and to bring to the table what I bring.  If it’s friendship, please let it be a helping hand, a word of advice, an extra ear or tissue. If it’s an intimate relationship, let it be your own place, a job and a vehicle. These are just the minimum. Of course there are other things I would like for you to have but let’s just start off with the basics and go from there.

I take friendship seriously and you probably won’t be able to get in good if I can’t take you seriously.  If you are carry inconsistent behaviors or your actions don’t match up with what you say, please don’t plan on us being close. Further more,  if you tell me all of Susie’s business, I won’t be able to count on you not to tell Susie all of MY business. On the intimate side, I can’t count on you providing for me, if you fail to provide for yourself.

With all of this being said, I am clearly aware that no one is perfect. I’m NOT perfect and I have my own downfalls. But I would like for the people that I am interested in engaging in to at least bring equally what I have brought. Even better, if I bought the table, bring something else for it. There should be a purpose of us working together. You shouldn’t just want to be on my team because you liked the way the table looked. Add something to it!

So please cut it out with the “You are what you attact business.” It’s so not true. I know what I am and what I strive to be and some of these individuals that I’ve met don’t even come close.

~AM I N_My_Write_Mind?

Don’t forget to visit my website http://www.wordsbywritemind.com for any updates or new projects!

Love Lessons 101

So of course I had to get the new Marsha Ambrosia album. Let me just say that I am a fan. It’s all about love! But she has a song called “Love”. I am on love’s side. Hopeless romantic? Maybe. I think it will come eventually. The song urges to let love in. But I sometimes find it hard to just let love come in. After all the heartbreaks, I started to think I could avoided those by not being so free.

So many times we (well me/I) make wrong decisions about dating or who we let in our circle. What are these decisions based on? I believe it’s solely based on how we feel at that moment. If I’m feeling all lovey dovey, of course I’m on a mission to find love. Then comes that feeling….”Oh dear. Why did I ever even give that person a chance?” The highs and lows of love are just life.

Maybe problem is me think I have to try just to see what happens. This could possibly be my trouble. Ignoring all the signs because I just wanted to see what happened. I take that back, I didn’t ignore the signs. I saw them. I even pondered about how to get around them. But I ended up right back where I was.

With all of that, I need to learn to let love in when it’s the right type of love. I’m ready to take a lesson in love. Love Lessons 101: Recognize and don’t ignore the signs.

~Am I N_My_Write_Mind?

Don’t forget to visit my website http://www.wordsbywritemind.com for any updates or new projects!

Just Forget It, I’m Doing What I Want When I Want

My friend came up with this idea that she was going to be in this “Eff it mentality”. If you don’t know what that means I can explain. It means you don’t care what people think. You do what you want and how you want without caring what people have to say. You make decisions based on what’s best for you and you only. So in the back of your mind you’re saying, “You only live once.” Then you ask yourself, “So why not do it?” Your conclusion is, “Because if you don’t you’ll regret it.”

I laughed at first because just doing what you want isn’t always what you can do. But after serious consideration, it’s probably what needs to be done in order for us to be happy or maintain happiness.

Happiness is a choice and so is the decision to do what you want and say “eff it”. I started doing that a few weeks ago. There are some things, people and situations that I let get to me, bother me and really stress me out. But I realized there’s so much more to do than to just stress about things.

A few weeks ago, I decided to sign up to volunteer for a literacy program. Over the weekend, I decided to make a big business commitment. I’ve spent a lot of money to get to where I need to be. Guess what? That makes happy regardless of what people around me think or say.

With me choosing to be happy, I started not to care about situations that are not important. A few weeks ago, it would be easy to steal my joy or make me upset about something. Today maybe not so easy. I wouldn’t say I’m all the way in the “Eff it mentality” as my friend is. I still have a little way to go. But I’m happier now that I started to go that route.

So to my friend, let’s rule the world with this choice to be happy!

~Am I N_My_Write_Mind?

Don’t forget to visit my website http://www.wordsbywritemind.com for updates on events and new projects!

Don’t Lose Your Chef Touch

One of my co-workers asked me to cook them something. Then another jumped in and said, “You can cook and you use to cook all the time.” She was right. I know how to cook. I’m always flattered when people as me to cook them something. The act if cooking or trying a new recipe is always to calming. Maybe it’s because I love food.

But I don’t cook often anymore. It’s just me. No husband, boyfriend or children. I always make sure I’m busy and on the go. I literally run out of time. When I had a significant other, I cooked often. Maybe because I knew someone was actually counting on me to have something prepared and I wasn’t bothered about it.

Because it’s just me, I found myself wasting a lot of food. I know what you’re thinking. I could freeze it. But I have a phobia about food being left out, eating after two days and frozen food. I don’t know why but I just do. So I choose to always cook simple meals. Or if push comes to shove, I go over my parents to see what they have brewing. It’s nice to have parents whose door is always open.

But with this observation I realized that I need to
1. Start making time to cook
2. Learn how to cook more meals that are for one person
3. Practice so I won’t loose my cooking touch for when “that” man comes. (Don’t worry. I’m laughing so hard at this one).

I don’t want to lose my chef touch. Maybe I’ll start on Monday (inserts another chuckle)

~Am I N_My_Write_Mind?

The Fight To Do It Anyway

Lately I’ve had so many ideas and projects running through my head. If only I had the time and resources to do everything. Of course when you are passionate about something, you think it’s the greatest idea in the world. Have you ever had someone tell you that they don’t believe in you? They don’t actually say it. But their actions and “beat around the bush” responses say it all.

I thought about what I planned. Then just today, I had a friend tell me her ideas. (Let me just insert here that my friends are awesome and I support what they do). Ideas are good. Planning is better. Hard work makes it great. But it’s that execution at the end that is definitely the most satisfying feeling in the world. In the middle of all that, you’ll have people tell you it’s not a good idea or that it won’t work. They may doubt you, your idea and your dream. But let me tell you, I’ve been through a few situations to say that if you are determined, you will find a way.

You may not have everything and everyone you need right away. Those resources that you counted on may not come through. I’ve been there. I know what it’s like to have people tell me that what I’m doing won’t work. Those are people that are rooting for you on the sidelines to quit. But that’s it. They are on the sidelines and not in the game. They aren’t going to help you win if they aren’t on the team.

I had to give myself that pep talk recently when I went to some people who I thought were trustworthy. The only thing trustworthy was the truth in how they really felt. But it just adds fuel to my determination to burn just a little bit longer.

~Am I N_My_Write_Mind?

Don’t forget to visit my website http://www.wordsbywritemind.com for updates on events and projects.

You Bought The Shoes, Wear Them.

A person’s character is made up of so many things. How youtalk, what you think and what they do. I need to see a person’s character to match in everything they do in life. You can’t just say you are a certain way, but your actions tell another story.

People say things all the time to boost up who they really are. A good example is who you are on paper, like your resume. I’m sure there are some more exaggerated items listed just so you can look better on paper. My point here, is that you can’t just say you are a good person. Your actions have to match and back up what it is you believe you are. When you go into the interview, they will most certainly ask questions to make sure what’s on paper matches the real you.

I met a woman yesterday who asked to state what are you in three words. Then she said, whatever you say you are, be that everyday and you won’t have any trouble being who you said you were. This lady who I’d never met before made such an impact on my night.

Sure, I try to live and be exactly who I say I am. But it made me think even harder about what I WANT to be. I’m about to be 30 in a few weeks and I’m not everything I want to be. We all have this vision that we will be in certain places in our lives by certain times. But I realized that if we truly walk in the shoes we bought ourselves, then we shouldn’t have any problem wearing them.

~Am I N_My_Write_Mind?

Don’t forget to visit my website http://www.wordsbywritemind.com for updated information about events and new projects!

Holding On To Bitterness

The closer I get to age 30, the more I realize what I failed to pay attention to before. What I thought may have been just isn’t. Maybe it took for me to grow older and experience more to realize.

One of those things is that I’ve been bitter about a few things. I try not to be one of those people that become upset about everything that goes wrong. When I was younger, someone told me that I needed to watch what I complained about. Everything won’t be a battle and I need to do a better job of what I choose will be a battle.

In my teenage years, I use to blame everything bad on other people’s actions. But really most of it was because of me. Every decision I’ve made up to this point was just that… A decision that I made. No one made them for me.

Although I don’t regret anything about anything, I take th as learning experiences. So when I was faced with a bitterness attitude, I had to catch myself. What exactly was I bitter for? I was bitter toward myself and my own actions. I was so upset at myself that I became overly cautious.

We may be upset at ourselves about making wrong decisions. But we have to learn how to not be so upset that we become bitter toward ourselves or toward other people. Holding on to anger and bitterness does more harm than good. I had to learn that hard way.

~Am I N_My_Write_Mind?

Independence

Ha! I just posted about how my poetry wasn’t all that great. I’d been working on one just for today. This may be one of the only ones I share. Remember, I love poetry but it’s not my specialty. Since today is Independence Day, I thought I’d share a few independence ideas. Not just Independence Day. Enjoy!

 

Independence

I

I am me, us and we.

I am willing to eat from the tree

of life. I am dynamic all by myself.

I create a high, yet obtainable shelf

of my heart, laid out for others to take a piece.

I pray, strive for blessings, prosperity and increase.

I choose to stand alone with no help

but often I find myself saying welp…

I couldn’t rely on anyone else but I. Not us and we but I.

 

N

No. I will not be pushed aside while you unintentionally or intentionally

remind me that you tried to beat me mentally.

No reason to think your skin tone, occupation or wallet width make you superior.

No. I will not let you beat me down about my exterior

No. I can not allow you to ask for money, my time or a favor

Ask me again to sign your life waiver.

Because I stand alone, the answer is no.

 

D

Do me a favor and knock it off. I mean this nonsense

You tried to fill our minds with illegitimate contents.

Do realize that I’m far too intelligent for you to beat me in monopoly.

The insult and paid of such a mockery.

Is too much to bare.

You see… you’ve put me in this formed square.

Do give me the benefit of the doubt.

The more you push me, gives me the more reason to pout.

Do allow me to prove to you that I’m not a misfit.

Hmph, I realize you just want a remense of my lipstick.

 

E.

Exhibit always good grace and posture.

Exhibit the brightness of my day and politeness

while keeping the comments in the workplace lightless.

Exhibit the world and corporate America,

that you know how to maintain that image of hysteria.

Exhibit the difference between content and advantage

Eventually I will learn how and when to manage.

 

P.

Priceless is that moment when we legalized

our so called freedom and the intent of equalize.

Priceless is the thought that my heart is far richer than my outside shell.

Priceless because I stand alone and no one can tell you different.

But your intent has nothing to do with my intent.

Priceless is that idea that I need anyone

Priceless is that moment when I’m in my own zone.

 

E.

Exclusive is the path to my love and my heart.

You’ll never have it all because it’s so complex like abstract art.

Exclusive are the resources, they don’t want you to have to gain knowledge.

They’d rather us as a group jump off the ledge

Exclusive is the media to shed light on the positive

and those of us who want to use cognitive

structure.

Exclusive is me, myself and I discriminating

against those that mean no good.

Exclusive is the idea of me articulating, that I’m eliminating

those that call themselves making me exclusive to them.

 

N. 

Neutral is the side for those who free ride.

But if I was forced, I would continue to choose my side.

Neutral is what they want us to think they chose.

Neutral is what you chose through the highs and lows.

Neutral is that moment when you’re indecisive

Because you are too busy being precise and righteous.

Neutral is where I won’t be because I stand alone.

 

D.

Decide what you actually believe in and what builds your character.

Of your life, who is your director, editor and narrator?

Decide what ruffles your feathers or in line with your objective

Decide the right people to connect to; effective

to your purpose

Decide who you call a friend and those qualified to loan.

Decide why you stand alone.

 

E.

Equal are the individuals well organized

Equal are those not formalized to glorify

Their own selfishness.

Equal are those comparable and uniform,

willing to a likeness to conform and perform

Equal is a matched purpose and motives

Equal is because I stand alone and I notice

 

N.

Non conventional is your own creativity and creativity.

Non conventional is your individual productivity.

Non conventional is relativity what you make it.

Non conventional is non complacent.

Non conventional is taking advantage of self what you have to offer.

Non conventional is a energetic show stopper.

C.

Confidence is boldness and fearlessness to be daring.

Confidence poise, spunk and non comparing

Confidence is tenacity, self-reliance and coordination

Confidence is sure and hiding your frustration.

Confidence is certainty, precision and representation.

I am confident because I stand alone.

E.

Extraordinary is me because I am Independent:

I am me

I know how to say no.

I do.

I exhibit

I am priceless

I am exclusive

I am not neutral

I decide

I am equal

I am non conventional

I am confident

I am extraordinary.

 

~Am I N_My_Write_Mind?

Don’t forget to visit my website http://www.wordsbywritemind.com for information on events, updates and new projects!

Bucket List On Pause… The Importance of Writing Goals

Today I saw a writing prompt about “Bucket Lists.” I made a so called bucket list but called it “My Life To Do List”.  My list consisted over 100 of my life long things I wanted to do and accomplish. Some items were as small as eating at a specific restaurant or buying an item for my house. Other items were big items such as visit another state or country.

I was upset because after a while, I lost track of the list. I kept it in one of my journals. But I believe during one of my spring cleaning episodes, I may have shred it in error.

When I saw this prompt, it made me think about my list. I thought about how it was once so important and precious to me. Thinking about this prompt forced me to reflect on that list impacted my daily routine. Although, I don’t have the list anymore, I wouldn’t want to say that it isn’t as important now. I may not be able to remember all of the items listed, but I know I’ve completed some of them. One of the most important was to write a book. Not only did a write a book, I wrote 2 and working on my third. That wasn’t mentioned to boast. It was mentioned so that I stress the importance of writing goals down.

I wrote my goal and put a time frame on it. My ideas were written down with the initial idea of “someday.” Then the word someday became an actual date. My biggest fear is failure. So when I set dates, I pushed myself even harder.

But now that my list is gone, my life to do list was on hold with no ideas and no dates. I’ll have to start over. But when is starting over ever such a bad idea? Hopefully, I can think of items that I haven’t accomplished and maybe even add more to my list! Thank you writing prompt… My bucket list is no longer on hold.

 

~Am I N_My_Write_Mind?

Don’t forget to visit my website http://www.wordsbywritemind.com for information on events, updates and new projects!

I Love It, But It’s Not My Specialty

The rule of life is to not compare yourself to others. While I agree with this, I did realize that comparison is sometimes needed for reality. Before you get your underwear in a bunch and tell me how much I’m wrong, let me explain.

I consider myself a writer. Whether I’m writing a novel, a blog, a short story or poetry, it’s all writing. But with writing, I just don’t think you can be an expert of all genres. I’m only speaking about my circumstance. I do however believe that you can have a love for all of them.

I scrolled through Facebook and watched countless videos about writing. But not just ordinary videos. These were people performing spoken word. I love poetry and spoken word. I’ve even dabbled in a little. But have yet to find that voice. All of these other courageous individuals have taken on a stance to publicly share their rhyming words and critical thinking concepts.

As I continued to watch, I mumbled “God, these people are good. What they are saying matters!” After I was done, I went to my iPad to work on some pieces. But I became frustrated because my mind keep wondering to fiction writing. Fiction… Character building for the next novel.

I kept asking myself why I couldn’t focus on poetry. I was so into perfecting a genre I wasn’t so good at. Those videos were inspiring me to write something great…. However, what I came up with was not quite as good as the videos I watched.

I know what you’re thinking. Why is she comparing her work to others? I don’t look at it as comparing. I discovered that I have a great love for poetry and spoken word. I’m intrigued by word play and critical thinking. But my real passion is fiction. This encouraged me to focus on my specialty and that’s fiction writing. I will still continue to write all genres because I never know what may become if it. But I will always put more energy into fiction writing. It’s my true love. I’ll just sit back and enjoy listening to other people’s spoken word. I love it, but it’s not my specialty.

~Am I N_My_Write_Mind?

Don’t forget to visit my website http://www.wordsbywritemind.com for information on events, updates and new projects!