Shacking Up vs. Becoming Closer

As I stated before in a previous posting, my boyfriend and I are currently in a long distance relationship. Although we have our moments when it becomes extremely hard, I believe we do our best in trying our best to make it work. We are continually restricted to weekends and holidays to spend time with each other. Even though we’ve been dating for a while, our next step would be engagement. However, he doesn’t think so.

In one of our random conversations, he says “When I move here, we will have to get a bigger place. A one bedroom is just not big enough.” Now as he said this I was thinking to myself, wait a minute. When were we going to move in with each other? We never agreed that we would move in together.

 Against my better judgement, I decided to entertain the idea of us moving in together. The idea just didn’t settle well with me. Of course I wanted us to be closer but I didn’t want us to be that close. Of all the couples I’ve known to move in with each other, I’ve only known one of them to actually work.

I’m pretty traditional when it comes to the steps toward a relationship.  Court, Date, Engagement, Marriage then Move-In. Even with moving in being the last of steps, I compromised my steps for him. If we were engaged then I wouldn’t mind us moving in. His only debating point was moving in together would only make our relationship better.

He began to debate my theory that moving into together just wouldn’t work. Moving in together with no immediate intention of getting married is simply called “shacking up”. He defined moving in as just the next step of making us stronger. Of course, I don’t agree with this point, so I tried to change the subject. Neither one of us were giving in and agreeing.

When I didn’t budge and agree for us to move it, he told me that I always thought  I was right.  It’s not that I think I’m always right, I just thought that the idea of us moving in together is not a good idea. Moving in together is a serious move. (A move we just aren’t ready for). My theory is if I’m good enough to move in with, then I should be good enough to marry. We would just be roommates with benefits.

~Am I N_My_Write_Mind?

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